Special Pages

Friday, December 9, 2011

Family Love

It is so easy to neglect our family.  I believe this happens because we take for granted that they will always be there.  Around this time in 2005, I had closed on a new home.  My mother and sisters came to Florida to help me move into my new home.  Think about it.  Christmas coming, unpacking, setting up a new home and trying to decorate all at the same time.  It was so chaotic that I had to laugh.  We actually were able to put up the Christmas tree on Christmas eve.  By New Years day, we had gotten some semblance of order.  The day after New Years day my mother and sister left headed back to the Carolinas.  Little did I know that this would be the last holiday that we would spend with our mother.  On January 9, 2006, my mother died of a blood clot in the lung.  Talk about shocked and devastated.  I am just glad that I had a special time with my mother that holiday.  I hugged her and kissed her and just babied her.  This was something that I never did because my mother was such a strong black woman.  There was never any room to pamper her.  However,  the time that we spent together during that Christmas revealed a vulnerability in her that I had never seen.  I can remember whispering in her ears that I loved her. It was like a vale was removed between us and roles were beginning to be reversed.  For the first time in my life, I saw her as my baby who needed to be loved and protected.  I am so glad that God granted me this time with her. I am glad we spoke those words that are often times left unspoken.  I know she left here knowing that I truly loved her and I know that she truly loved me.  Take time this holiday to mend fences and speak the unspoken.  We never know for whom the bell will toll.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Did You Know That There Are Five Love Languages?

Boy!  I wish someone had explained this to me some time ago.  Life surely would have been easier for the kid.  Gary Chapman explains this theory in detail in his series of books called, "The Five Love Languages".  Needless to say, I went through life loving others as my mother and grandmother expressed love to me.  It just seemed like the natural  thing to do...right?  Ok, so as we get older, we learn something new everyday.  You can in fact teach an old dog a new trick.  I learned that there are five distinct ways that people give and receive love.  They are 1. Words of Affirmation, 2. Gifts, 3. Acts of Service, 4. Quality Time, 5. Physical Touch.  Low and behold the love language of your parents will be the one that you learn how to speak first and will be your primary language.  This is called the "heart language".  It is definitely a must that you know how you receive love and how your significant other receives love.  Once this is understood both of your love cups stay full.  For example, If your love language is gifts or acts of service and you are given words of kindness, no matter how many kind words that are said to you, you will always feel empty.  However, a simple small box of Godiva chocolates of a new gadget of some sort will go a very long way.  Get it now?

Uncle Tom's Cabin....Not at all what I thought!

I just finished reading Uncle Tom's Cabin.  I never read it in school and was curious.  I have always heard about this book but never read it.  I was further drawn to read it because I recently read some where that this book was very instrumental in getting slavery abolished in America.  I never knew that abotu this book. I now understand why.  Harriet Beecher Stowe has my utmost respect after reading her book.  She was able to capture the essence of the brutality and inhumanity of slavery in a way that ALL could understand.  She did an excellent job of telling the story and opnions of both the Southern slave owner and  the Northern abolitionist. I was surprise to know that the Northern Abolitionists were not as noble as I was lead to believe.  The last paragraph of the book sums it all up beautifully. " A day of grace is yet held out to us.  Both North and South have been guilty before God; and the Christian Church has a heavy account to answer.  Not by combining together, to protect injustice and cruelty, and making a common capital sin, is this Union to be saved, - but by repentance, justice and mercy; for, not sure is the eternal law by which the millstone sinks in the ocean, than that stronger law by which injustice  and cruelty shall bring on nations the wrath of Almight God!".....  Wow!  Good stuff.  This book should go back to being a MUST Read. How soon we forget or never really come to understand.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Greatest Love Affair

Have you ever thought about what it would be like to meet the person of your dreams? I mean, the perfect match. Not only meet this person but find that you also are the person of his or her dreams.  Yes, we are truly talking about a match made in heaven. Before I die, I want to experience "The Greatest Love Affair".  Is this just a female thing or is this something that men desire too? For me, I want this affair to be all encompassing. Great sex, passionate and spine tingling kisses, intellectual compatibility, common likes and interests.  Yes, the whole shebang!  Am I being unrealistic?  I know that I am a dreamer. I know that every day can't be like heaven. However, I would like to think that I can coexist with a special someone and feel the magic of true love. Are there others like myself who desire this experience? What more, are there couples out there living my dream? I was married before and divorced so I don't have my head in the clouds but I would like to think that I have learned from my past mistakes and can strive to have a Great Love Affair.  Where are you on this one?

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Another Great Book - "The Conversation" by Hill Harper

I am always one for a great book so when I read one, I love to share that knowledge.  Hill Harper does an excellent job in this book discussing how men and women, particularly Black men and women, can build loving, trusting relationships.  I will tell you that he left NO stone unturned.  There are great conversation points that will definitely add a spark to your next dinner party.  I particularly loved the quotes that started each new chapter.  Some of my favorites are: "Patience is a secret weapon that forces deception to reveal  itself.", " The relationships that I have taken most seriously are the ones that progressed from A to F to I...Acquaintance to Friendship to Intimacy.",  "Wise commitments do not bind us; they free us.  To the spiritually immature, "commitment" is a very scary word because it is internalized as bondage. But to the spiritually mature, commitment is the equivalent of freedom because it bestows authentic happiness that cannot be taken away.", and last " Love seeks to satisfy others at the expense of self.  Lust seeks to satisfy self at the expense of others.  WOW!  This is what I call great stuff!  Read "The Conversation" for yourself and tell me what YOU think.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Great Book at a Great Price about Great Women

I just read the best book! Cokie Roberts absolutely amazed me with her insightfulness.  This book discusses all of the roles that women have played.  Most importantly Cokie has a story of success for all women no matter what age, religion, race, or political belief. I absolutely could not put this book down.  This is a book that ALL women can truly be proud of and embrace. I, especially as a Black woman, am proud about the way that she paid homage to the works of black women like Ida B. Wells and Dorothy Height.